Will an open adoption work for you?

Giving your child up for adoption is a difficult decision, but it is often the best choice you can make for your child. The adoptive family will enjoy the blessing you have given to them, and they will be able to provide a nice life for your child.

Despite knowing how good adoption can be, you may still feel held back by emotions. The idea of not knowing your child and missing out on his or her life may feel overwhelming to you. If this is your situation, then you may want to consider an open adoption.

What Is an Open Adoption?

Open adoption, according to the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services, is when you have involvement with the family who adopts your child. You will get to know them, know who they are, have the ability to have contact with them from the adoption onward.

Sometimes open adoption also means that you will stay in contact with your child. You will be able to watch him or her grow up and be a part of his or her life. Your child will always know he or she went through adoption, and that you are his or her mother.

The way your open adoption takes shape is dependent on what you and the adoptive family agree to. You can work out the details as part of the adoption process. You will work with the agency or nationwide adoption facilitator to define what your situation will be like.

What It Is Not

While you may still have some contact with your child, you will not be his or her legal parent. The adoption still transfers your parental rights to the adoptive parents. You may not be able to be in every part of your child’s life. You also should not expect the child to call you “mom” or for you to assume the mother role.

You have to find a balance with the adoptive parents. It is important to have clear boundaries and understand your role in your child’s life. You do not want to step on the toes of the adoptive parents.

It’s Your Decision

You get to make the decision on whether or not to choose an open adoption. Your adoption agency or whoever is coordinating your adoption will look for families who match your choice. So, it will not prevent your child from finding a good family. You should make the decision based on your own feelings and opinions.

Meet the Author

Karie Herring

Karie Herring rambles of a former life in Phoenix, AZ while raising a teen and tween twins in their new home in Orlando, FL. She has been featured in AOL Money & Finance, Betty Confidential and Career School Now. She's a full-time technical writer, functional fitness athlete, overachieving wife and mom. She loves talking about maneuvering motherhood, womanhood, and her passion for essential oils and natural living.

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